Why & When blokes most require some support and assistance:
There's a several factors can have a negative effect on a man’s physical, mental and emotional and wellbeing. These include one, or a combination of:
• Isolation, loneliness, lack of social support.
This can stem from things like unemployment, ill-health, geographic distance or old age;
• Work-related pressures
Including high expectations, job insecurity, or a huge and complex workload under very difficult conditions (eg farmers);
• Ongoing injury or disability
• Unemployment or retirement.
Without work, some men lose their sense of identity as well as their social networks;
• Relationship issues/breakdown
Including the pain of losing regular contact with their children
• Legal or financial problems
such as debt and bankruptcy
• Chronic illness or pain
• Suicide by a family member or close friend
• Alcohol or drug abuse – one in three people who attempt suicide are under the influence of alcohol; and
• Mental illness – depression and psychotic illnesses(such as schizophrenia) are both major risk factors for suicide. Risk increases dramatically after discharge from hospital or with changes to treatment. People who have previously attempted suicide are at a particularly high risk of suicide.
Men in prison or custody have a suicide rate three times that of the general
population;
What blokes already know, and how to use the information:
- Men usually try self-help approaches to health/wellbeing issues first.
Blokes generally try to deal with their health, wellbeing and life issues on there own first, before seeking assistance or support from others.
Check out our great, DIY health and wellbeing checks and tests, available online, as well as our Men specific and general health, wellbeing and life issue services/supports/resources.
- Men traditionally have been less likely to seek help for emotional problems than women.
• Men may not recognise symptoms of emotional distress.
• Many men prefer to work things out themselves, perhaps not
wanting to appear weak or be a burden on others. Some may be embarrassed or
ashamed about their distress.
Great! Do It Yourself then, get informed with our FAQs, DIY self assessment tests. and massive directory of services/supports. Many supports can be done confidentially online, by text, by
telephone or face-to-face. Use what works for you.
• Men may not know where to find the right service or know what services can offer.
In some areas, particularly rural areas, these services may not be available locally.
Check out our massive Australia wide directory of men specific and general services/support/resources
• Men may not place a high priority on allocating time to seek help and resolve issues.
15 minutes here will find just about any mens related health, wellbeing or life issue support/service/resource/directory you might need.
Many services may not appear to be male-friendly.
• Men may feel uncomfortable discussing their problems or talking about their feelings
– particularly in rural communities, which place a high value on self-sufficiency.
Use confidential online, text, phone supports/services if you dont like face to face. For men in rural
communities, go to a larger to or the city if practical to use
Are you feeling depressed, or like commiting suicide?
If you are, this is not the time to let pride, embrassment, or acting "like a man" get in the way of seeking some support. Approximently 500,000 men a year in Australia suffer depression, and
approximently 1400 men every year commit suicide.
THIS IS NOT THE TIME TO FUCK AROUND! It is simply not good enough, that
so many men suffer in silence every year, some choosing to kill themselves
rather than feel supported enough to seek assistance. We take this shit
personally.
If you are feeling depressed, or like commiting suicide.
Please go straight to our
"Crisis & First Point Contacts for Men" link
at the right to side of this page. And cotact a support service!
20 ways to contact services and supports,
WITHOUT feeling like a complete dickhead
This is about assisting men to make intitial contact with services/and supports. As men are more fearful of asking for assistance, than nearly anything else. Some of these suggestions of course are an outright pisstake, others are as serious as crematation. But the simple and clear message is Make Contact with Someone, Somehow!
1. Ring and hang up the phone if you need to, do it until you feel up like you can talk
2. Call and tell them you are not ready to talk, that you just needed to make the call, and that you may need to hang up.
3. Call, tell them you have have the wrong number and hang up
4. Tell them you have the wrong number, but while you have them you have a question to ask
5. Tell them you drunk/smashed, not sure what your doing
6. Tell them you are calling about a friend, relative or co-worker
7. Tell them you are a student researching their service
8. Tell them you are making an abusive phone call
9. Tell them you are a journo doing "a piece"
10.Tell them you are a union rep/OHS rep finding out about the service for other member/workers
11. Give them a name you want to give
12. Tell them ManINFO.org suggested you call
13. Tell them you have hit rock bottom and dont know what to do
14. Ask to speak with a male or female, depending on who you feel more confortable with
15. Ask to speak to someone of your cultural, religious, social beliefs if that makes you feel more comfortable
16. Tell them you are community worker calling for a client
17. Tell them you are worried about "somebody"
18. Tell them you got a crossed line, by while you have them
19. Tell them you are doing a survey
20. If not emergency, Contact them by email, SMS, MSM, Snail mail
21. Ask them a general question eg" what is depression"
22. Tell then you dont know were to start
23. Call and ask for the time
24. Tell them your a telemarketer
25. Call them and ask them what they are wearing. Huh???
Other tips:
- Use Bulk billing to see GP's etc if money is tight,
- Take a sickie, get a doctors certificate and have a check up while your there,
- Tell the GP you need require a medical for work, if you feel better about it.
- Ask your GP what a mental health plan is.
- Take advantage of "health weeks" for check ups, club/work check ups.
Who men talk too, when they "can't talk to anyone"
Reality shows many men who are dealing with health and life matters will avoid discussing them with family, friends, associates and the like. In fact the worse the issues seems the more "closed lipped" many men often are.
This may stem from blokes:
- not wanting to worry family etc with their issues
- not wanting to feel stupid, incapable, weak, unable to deal with things themselves, or the like. In the eyes of others that they know, or themself.
- not sure how to discuss the issue, or how to deal with it, or were to get assistance that works for them
- feeling they are alone in the world, and and this is there burden to carry by themself.
The many honest, heart felt responses we have recieved from many men about this area indicated some interesting results.
- A loved pet:
Interestingly, many blokes who may struggle with talking to anyone about there life issues, often freely admit to talking to there pet about there life issues, and credit their pet for getting them through some real rough patches.
- Pastors:
A surprising large number of men indicate they use the services of community religious supports. Of course many of these men outlined that they have strong faith in their belief, and use the supports its offers. Interestingly, significant amounts of men who are not particularly religious, have indicated they have seen a pastor (or the like) to discuss where and how they may access community assistance for themselves, or their families on a wide range of matters.
- Confidential online chat,email, text contact, helpline
Men are imbracing this approach to contact & communicate with health and life matter services and supports. Its easy, designed to be discreet, and can provide many of the intitial benifits face-to-face contact could provide. Many health and life matters organisations offer at least some form of contact this way. Eg: MensLine had approx 60,000 men cantact them one way, or another last year.
- See a G.P you don't know
When blokes feel uncomfortable, or just want to keep a health issue on the "low down" they will sometimes avoid the family GP and go to a clinic GP they dont know. This allows for men to discuss health and wellbeing issues with someone they will never have to see again. Not ideal, however the responses we got indicate that quite a few men do this, and if it gets them to see a GP a couple of times a year, and have a check up, well fantastic. Just remember, atleast keep your family doctor in the loop about whats going on with your health and wellbeing. We really believe your regular GP needs to be part of you travelling along ok for years to come.
The point is, there's a method, type, approach, support, service, resource, available out their that every bloke can use and benifit from.
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